The Let Down
When I found this bike I wanted
Looked through the papers, I found a job
At this bar they said was haunted
To keep the children far away
From a place filled with men and women
Who wanted their partners to fade
Since all the love came with permission
I met an old man—a millionaire
And watched his wrinkles as they whirled
Said his money bought him affairs
When all he wanted was the world
But his bones had turned to ash
Said I was better than this town
Then he pulled out his biggest stash
And said, “girl, don’t let me down.”
I left my compass under a bench
At a local parking lot
Left the town’s cultural stench
Headed south with no plans to stop
I met a girl right at the borders
Of a place I didn’t know
She carried supplies all on her shoulders
That could just last her through the snow
Her name was Annabelle, Annabelle Stone
With her blond hair and eyes fire warm
Said it wasn’t rational to travel this part on my own
Asked me where I was heading to
I told her I would make him proud
She said, “I wouldn’t if I were you.”
I told her I wouldn’t let him down
We settled mid-wayOr so we thought
Set up a camp
And called it a night
Rolled out our sleeping bags on the top
Of a mountain under starlight
Kissed the sparkles and closed our eyes
But her conscious spoke in the dark
She spoke about all her silent good-byes
All her leaves without remarks
Then she mentioned a man of gold
With raven hair and eyes cold as ice
All the happiness that he stole
Left her with a heartbreak twice the size
She whispered prayers under her breath
Said just in case he came around
Asked her why he threatened her to death
She told me she had let him down
Deer Woman
And, darling, hold my hand
And count to three
You’re a chameleon
You’ve been hiding
From false comprehensions
In your head
Run this scene
Amongst the science and
Beastly things
You’re getting drunk up on reality
One you’ve come up with
In your
Instead
But—
Little dear girl
Little deer woman
Why are you so down?
Little deer girl
Little dear woman
Aren’t you tired of find your heart
In the lost and found?
You’ve suffered these heartburns
Caused by poisonous trains
I would know, I would know, I would know
And you’ve hid in the suburbs
With your chronic of pain
You don’t show, you don’t show, I still know
You keep on going down
Was it someone you confided in
Performing an act just to hide
The perfect suicide
Our time will ever find
This cyanid
And did I magnify
The implied and emotional insecticide?
It was all just publicized
I never really made any sense
So good night
Utter Fascination
You had me weak at the knees
Could’ve sworn
I had you up in my dreams
No
They could have sworn
I drew your name on every line
Could’ve sworn
Your voice kept me up at night
No
All these hopeless romantics
Couldn’t believe their eyes
When I got clumsy and frantic
Whenever you passed by
Said it before, I’ll say it again
I’ll hum this tune to the very end
Love is born, but eventually dies
That’s why all this is nothing but
Utter fascination
By the way you are, oh yes
It’s just empty implications
With zero innovation
Thoughts without the acts, oh yes
It’s just utter fascination
Give it a while it will pass
Oh, it will pass
The Woman with Antlers Liked Green Objects
Left it by your door
No more paintings on my windows
Couldn’t care less anymore
Sold my paintings during my night shifts
Didn’t get much in return
All these pedestrian lovers
Didn’t show much concern
To who I painted
You were the one I painted
Oh, you could’ve had me
Pick it up and shove it in your cupboards
Have you read what I wrote?
Have you contemplated all the colors?
The words I never spoke?
With every hair a symphony
In case you needed the company
I know you hated my melodies
I’ve always hated your scrutiny
Towards all I had painted
But you’ve been all I’ve been painting
Oh, you could’ve had me
Sinners (Good God, I’m Surrounded)
Could’ve been my own transcript
My own ticket out of here
But couldn’t hand it over to
Some mail-hunter sort of bandit
I’m a sucker for the yellow red blues
An achiever of a creeper on
Speed dial
In case I remember more details on the
Case file
Killed my conscious cold blooded
Now I’m on trial
Losing against my own yellow red blues
And I count down the days
Oh, these boats carry on
Nights through the dawn of the day
And I could down these heads
Oh, these souls carry on
I fall to the ground and I say
I’m surrounded by these sinners
And they’re all beautiful
But I’m not one of them
I spent my days in black
A whole summer’s time to mourn
Over something I never had
A sickness I’ve adorn
A state of mind so vile
And a voice slit down and torn
Dark beauties in different styles
Left me down-hearted and lorn
And I count down these days
Oh, these boats carry on
Night through the dawn of the day
And I count down these heads
Oh, these souls carry on
I fall to the ground and I say
I’m surrounded by these sinners
And they’re all beautiful
But I’m not one of them
Glass Room
Elevations
The sides directly under sun
But what about your plans and sections
The chaos you’ve become
She said she’d been living in this glass room
With nothing but a green-wrapped heart
Said that it had belonged to a lover
She longed for from the start
The I showed her where I was from
And all the bargains I’d made just for her
Showed her who I had become
Then I drifted into a sacred blur
Now all I recall are these flashing headlines
About a shooting back in town
And a millionaire who died with his eyes in mine
And said, “Girl, you let me down.”
The Choice*
You don’t know what more do you desire
Will you survive the night or rebuild an empire
What more could you acquire
We used to think we’d lose ourselves
To war
That one day mad men would come shoot
At our doors
But the land had decided our time had come
And now we fall to infection
One by one
You had no choice
Waking up within these situations
Spread across manifested nations
Watching out for those clicking transformations
We’ve always feared the new generations
Hope was forced on you when you lost all
Put your heart in the ground to avoid the fall
And now you know no sleep
Eyes open wide
Please don’t give up
On me tonight